Have you ever heard someone say “Bless your heart” to someone who just did something stupid, s***t, or “unchristian?” The latter is a broad umbrella. The phrase can be used by anyone really. I suppose, statistically, that’s bound to happen. But I’m talking about the dubious way of saying it. The kind that comes with a smile while making it clear that despite the sentiment you might expect from the phrase, the user means the opposite. That’s good old-fashioned religious condescension.

It’s a fantastic balancing act. When someone says it, it expresses that the receiver is to be blessed (a bad omen) and that the person saying it is above reproach! Look at them, among the lowly and unwashed, offering blessings to a common sinner! They certainly did not commit such acts! They are but an angel waiting to be reunited with their wings! But it’s not just Holier Than Thou types who use it (or variations). Some people just need to be a little petty (don’t we all).

That certainly seems to be the case Denzel Washington. Before I go any further, let me state that Denzel Washington can be mean if he wants to. The man earned that and then some. This piece is not an indictment of his pettiness, as I am in awe of his ability to be pettiness. He makes anything look good, so of course he can make the mean look good too. In this case, it’s all about who you choose to target, and Denzel chose well.

Denzel spoke to Esquire magazine and revealed his loss of an Academy Award in 2000. He lost it to Kevin Spacey. “At the Oscars, they said Kevin Spacey’s name American beauty,” Washington explained. “I remember turning around and looking at him and nobody was standing but the people around him. And everyone else was looking at me. Not that it was. Maybe that’s how I perceived it. Maybe I felt like everyone was looking at me. Because why would everyone be looking at me? Thinking about it now, I don’t think they were.”

Harmless enough. Aside from Denzel’s slight dig that no one is standing but the people around SpaceyDenzel played nice and then went in for the kill. “I’m sure I went home and drank that night. I had to,” Washington told the press. “I don’t want to sound like, ‘Oh, it won me the Oscar’ or anything like that. It wasn’t like that. And you know, the talk of the town is what’s going on over there on that side of the street, and that’s between him and God. I have nothing to do with it. I pray for him. That’s between him and his creator.” There it is!

Denzel didn’t have to say any of that. It’s also delicious to come right after him, making it clear he wasn’t upset. Spacey’s long and sordid history of assault allegations did not need to be grown up, but Denzel doing it is damn funny. It gives off big “I’m not mad, please don’t put in the paper that I’m mad” vibes. But Denzel is no drill. He’s actually someone who I think can play the holier than thou card and most people will just say “Yeah.”

Denzel finally receives the Oscar and is thoroughly self-deprecating as he describes having a “pity party” until he wins the award. Now he does whatever the hell he wants. He helps his sons make movies, he can give spoilers for Black Panther 3and roasting Kevin Spacey in a very public forum. We should all be so blessed.