Psychologists, digital health experts, and my smart friends, everyone advise not to pick up your phone in the morningclaiming that the barrage of notifications and tasks, dings and pings, all vying for your immediate attention, rushes the natural wake-up process and turns the tap full on the dopamine nozzle, messing with your internal rhythm before the drums even start. had a chance to start.

I, however, have an extra year streak on New York Times Crossword app to maintain, so any doctor worth the Hippocratic Oath would give me a doctor’s note stating that I am an exception to this proven science in a heartbeat, I’m sure.

In the last few days, though, I’m starting to think that maybe science has a point about the negative effects of my box received before my first (or second, or, let’s be real, third) cup of coffee.

One day last week, my first scroll of the day picked up the following subject lines, all received within hours of each other while I slept: “The timing is not great at all.” “No time to waste.” “Kase, can we say something – ANYTHING -?” “You deserve an explanation, Kase…“

Those are not from a former dirtbag, but from Kamala Harrishis presidential campaign and other groups directly supporting her. They want two minutes of my time, they want three to 47 dollars, they want explainthey have some bad news to share A particularly grim recent thread reads simply “You can either.”

They want a lot of things, but I want, I don’t know, a neck frequency to recover from the beauty of the optimism and can-do attitude I see during Harris’ rallies, compared to the atmosphere of -right rancid invading my inbox. a dozen times a day. If a human sent me these messages, I would ask them if they were okay, gently remind them that even though we broke up, I still care about them and want what’s best for them, and that I’m happy to I drive them to the help they need.

A week before Election Day, I can’t help but look at my morning dose of emailed devastation and think, “This isn’t the jolly warrior I fell in love with over the summer.” Remember how you felt watching the DNC this summer? Remember how things felt kind of…fun? My inbox certainly doesn’t.

Listen, I’m not new here. I know how important a steady drip-drip-drip of donations is to keep the campaign bus wheels turning for another week, and campaign vets tell me that, yes, the volume and alarmist tone of emails from campaign is an algorithmic one. tested and optimized dark art and that the communications teams that wreak havoc on me are usually isolated from the main campaign communications team. Kamala Harris, who spoke to a church congregation in Philadelphia on Sunday and said she sees voters standing together in the fight to defend freedom, knowing that we all have much more in common than what divides us,’ this is not the same Kamala Harris. which, the night before, landed in my inbox with the absolute heartbreaker of a subject line “Outsold. Bound. It falls short.” It attracts attention, you have to give it at least that.

And, hey, the other team survives on a steady diet of spam, albeit less “your sad ex-boyfriend who won’t stop calling” and more like, well, actual spam. Donald TrumpHis campaign comes back again and again to subjects who simply read “Congratulations!” and “Please!“Another notable repetition is just the recipient’s name, three times: “Kase Kase Kase“Another:”I love you! I love you! I love you!” This Nigerian prince would really like you to do that buy a MAGA hat. Another notable missive is simply titled “Fork!“The bombastic free-association quality of the Trump campaign’s emails more closely matches his persona in person (though call me when you catch this man saying ‘please’), but the frequency and drama, at least, fall within standard deviation for both campaigns.

Election Day is a week away, and our inboxes will surely breathe a sigh of relief knowing that we will soon be choosing between “I just got accused again!” and “Deeply worrying.” finally.