The honeymoon period is over for a newlywed couple who are taking some heat from their family for not sending them thank you cards in the mail.

In a post on Redditthe popular “Am I A——?” on the forum, a newlywed woman wonders whether or not she was wrong not to send wedding thank-you cards to her husband’s family, even though they all live in the same household.

In her post, the 28-year-old explained that she and her husband, 28, mailed thank you notes to everyone who attended their wedding, along with a few who couldn’t but sent them anyway a card or a gift. They live in a duplex with the groom’s sister, which they rent from his parents, so they assumed it wasn’t “necessary” to send them thank-you cards because they “see everyone almost every day” and believed that it would have been “repetitive”. “from what they told them in person.

“I personally thanked my husband’s parents for their help and his sister for everything,” the woman wrote. “I thanked them several times after each event.”

Even if the verbal thanks were enough for the bride’s family, they were not enough for the groom’s.

“Last night my husband went to see his mom and gave her the email and she asked if I sent her thank you cards. He told her I did and she mentioned she didn’t get one and his sister didn’t get one. for the wedding celebration,” said the woman, who then offered to take her family to dinner. “We talk to his sister every day but we made sure to thank her after the wedding because we live together and we told her a lot of thanks and that she didn’t need to bring us anything.”

The woman asks, “Should we send them thank you cards even though we live with them?”

Most Redditors sided with the groom’s family in the comments section.

“I would definitely send them a very heartfelt card or letter,” one person commented in part. “Actually, at this point, I’d send them a letter explaining everything they’ve done for you and continue to do, giving you a house and help with the wedding or shower. The written word means so much to so many of us.”

Another Reddit user added: “The idea that someone can’t take a few minutes out of their day to write a simple thank you note is mind boggling to me .”

Never miss a story – sign up PEOPLE’s free daily newsletter to keep up with everything PEOPLE has to offer, from celebrity news to compelling human interest stories.

Instead, several users said the family should not have expected congratulations when they received verbal acknowledgment.

“But she recognized kindness. In person. More than once,” another wrote. “Why does it have to be a text, book or letter?”